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Lockdown, the early days

I started this post many weeks ago and didn't post it so I've lost the original date, but it was from the relatively early days of lockdown. Maybe a few weeks in? Here goes:

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Probably none of this is interesting, but these are the things I've noticed during lockdown in Spain...

I am fine for a while but then I need an open window, thirsty for signs of life.

The mornings are quiet. I sleep late most mornings, in part thanks to nightly Benadryl but mostly because I can, so I do. I check my email, Instagram, and Twitter. I'm not much into social media, so none of this takes long. But I will check Twitter continuously during the morning waiting for some piece of information to take away some of the uncertainty, or to distract me for a while. My Twitter feed is slow until early afternoon, when the east coast starts to wake up and activate. Before then it is mostly European updates, sometimes news and sometimes pictures or funny videos or articles. It's interesting to live in these two worlds.

My Spanish has gotten decent. Well, that's an exaggeration. I can read much more than I can produce. Matt and I are watching a Netflix series in Spanish. In English it's Money Heist, but in Spanish it's Casa de Papel. They speak fast and it's hard to pick up almost anything, but we understand quite a bit by reading the subtitles. We do this so often now that I caught a glimpse of English subtitles yesterday and was really impressed by how good by comprehension of Spanish has become! It only took me a few seconds to figure it out--my mind's not that far gone.

Is it time to talk about the sadness? I want to know Barcelona as much as I love it, if that makes any sense. And I'm almost sure now that I won't get the chance. When all of this started I knew it would last a while, but I didn't know how long or to what extent. We still can't even set foot outside if we're not going out for groceries. We can only send one person out at a time for groceries and Matt always goes. He goes about once every five days, and it takes a while because there's a line at each of the three separate shops: the produce store, the grocery store, and the bakery. He delivers the groceries home and then showers and changes his clothes. We worry about bringing in the virus, but we don't know what else we can do. I think we are being safe. But I don't leave the house, ever, which means that the spring is passing us by and I can't get to know the streets, shops, restaurants, etc. that I have admired from the outside. I don't socialize with Spanish people (other than our Spanish teacher). I don't know what the rest of our months here will look like. I assume we'll get to go outside at some point, but will restaurants open? Will museums? Will we get to travel anywhere during our Europe stay?

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